No Red Lipstick

after 19 years I find myself here again…..

Redsmoon — Sat, 25 Feb 2012 09:04:55 +0000

He cannot say he loves me he cannot comfort me and hold me and tell me everything is going to be all right. I find myself in the lowest place ive been in 14+ years.we are dancing the dance again.it is my head again,I start to doubt the world around me,i lose me…I cannot survive without him I will not make it i wont go on.sleeps so peaceful the house is silent just ghosts and me awake feling the pain.they call to me it has been a few years since ive thought this way.I thought i was passed this point but here i find myself going through a frickin sterotypical 40 year old mid life crisis.its almost textbook.I cant make it im drowning and switching and in and out.all i need is him and if i cant get that back….time marches on.a star burns out…im fading….is anything real in my life how have i gotten to here?where am i what or who can i trust im not going to make it through….this is old pain this is old mind games this is my past haunting me somewhere i never thought i would have to visit again……….pain.ouch.not for long….not this time

Tagged: live like you were dying, pain

Wow I am in awe

Redsmoon — Sat, 04 Feb 2012 04:34:50 +0000

After being together almost 19 years since we were both 19 my hubby can still surprise me and be romantic and funny. For the moment, I am happy with my life, with my marriage. I feel so indescribable…

Tagged: hubby, love, wow

My life

Redsmoon — Mon, 30 Jan 2012 23:22:40 +0000

Everything is falling into place and im enjoying life.I will complete my book by 2013.i opened my website www.redsmoondesigns.com

Tagged: book, Redsmoon Designs

Recyclebank Rewards

Redsmoon — Mon, 30 Jan 2012 23:19:59 +0000

http://bit.ly/rb_eb2

#rbbeauty

Tagged: Pantene

This is a whole NEW START for my blog

Redsmoon — Thu, 15 Dec 2011 16:24:11 +0000

I am redoing my blog to try to be more focused on life and my wonderful tricks of frugal survival.I will be redoing the whole site and i will start to post topics from the book i am working on.I will try to keep my blogging negative personality under wraps and have them journal in a notebook.you can read all about them in the book i will be writing.In the ean time I am off to make homemade cranberry biscotti and if it tiurns out i ill post the recipe.

Tagged: Blog, Christmas, crafts, Facebook, FAQs Help and Tutorials, Psychology, Social Sciences, Twitter, WordPress

wanted: Friend For Hire

Redsmoon — Fri, 03 Jun 2011 19:47:20 +0000

wanted friend for hire

need a craft mided

eager friend/companion/partner

share craft show space

Complete my projects.

pay will come in % of profits

from computer internet sales and craft shows.

Not always payed in cash

may be in exchange for supplies,

products, craft items, unpcycled collections…

basically all my junk!!!

Must be ambitious & Outgoing

be able to tolerate total chaos…

and survive my house, studio, and

interesting work enviroment.

Please no males reply!! My hubby is the jealous type…

Sorry,,,Looking for Potential Female Friend

hours-negotiable

pay- fluctuates

benefits- knowledge in new crafts, education and experience with the mentally ill….

and

POTENTIAL FRIENDSHIP!!!!

Tagged: DID, frugal, mental illness, OCD

Bipolar 1 ugh my life

Redsmoon — Fri, 03 Jun 2011 19:22:01 +0000

gone is the creativeness and energy till the mood swings the other way.its just a waiting game.bipolar is a waiting for the other shoe to drop illness.its going so good then too good then psychotic then crash the depression and then lower then you either die or swing back up to the high again.

Tagged: DID, frugal, mental illness, OCD

My real mothers day

Redsmoon — Mon, 09 May 2011 14:02:05 +0000

so should i tell you my creative way of explaining my mom day or the straight truth ill do both.The day before my hubby took me to fashion bug to pick out a dress that i wanted for mothers day then took me to sams club to buy my fav coffee for my kcups and creamer in the morning i was made homemade biscuits and chocolate gravy my favorite southern food served to me in bed with a cup of coffee.we watched tv and relaxed and at noon we went for a drive in the country me with my hat i decorated and new lipstick then we went to the art exhibit at the museum and to an artist book signing and refreshments then we drove along the beach shore to view lake michigan and see the fancy homes on the lakefront.we came home i went into my room to relax his family came over and hubby made homemade custom pizzas for everyone then they left we had some amazing alone time and then everyone settled down to bed.ok reality i had a $10 gift card and a $15 dollar coupon for fashion bug so i got a $35.00 dress for under $10 went to sams club to pick up cheaper food and shit we needed still forgot the toliet paper we need to get.came home and i made 3 batches of homemade biscuits and cooked them put them in the microwave to sit overnight for morning ease and i made several batches of pizza dough was exhausted went to bed got up in the morning before others made myself a cup of coffee watched some tv fell back asleep hubby had to run out to get milk for choc gravy i cleaned up the mess after eeryone ate and put leftovers in fridge.got dressed up thinking he may have something planned he took me for a drive to the gas station that was giving away the premium car wash for free for moms so used me for car wash.then took me to the free museauym to look at the art and there happened to be a book signing and reception that had free cookies and candy we drove through downtown toook the wrong road ended up on other side of railroad tracks so we had to drive the long way home which follows along lake michigan and then we went home i got out all the toppings and set them up buffet style for my hubby to make everyones pizzas and i spent part of the evening in my room with my nephew on the internet looking for a scary clown name for him and trying to convince him to go into buisness with me as a clown and face painting for kids parties even though we specialize in horror makeup and we sent my photos of him to the costume store we shop at cause they want them for their website so i asked them for a store discount if we buy our supplies from them for advertising for them.took my pills and went to bed.now which story sounds better?

Tagged: DID, frugal, mental illness, OCD

mothers day 2011

Redsmoon — Sun, 08 May 2011 15:49:35 +0000

wow ive had 20 years of mother’s days for me.wew does that make me feel old.It was 90 degrees out that first mother’s day in 1991 when i was hugely pregnant with my first daughter.She was lying on my siatic nerve and i was on bedrest. My life has severly changed since then. I have raised 5 special children with unique individual quirks and illnesses while my self going through Bipolar 1 schizo affective dissorder Dissasociative Identity disorder or formerly known as multiple personality dissorder, Obsessive compulsive dissorder OCD Anxiety and Panic Attacks social phobia agoraphobia PTSD post traumatic distress dissorder,and ADHD.I think ive covered the whole alphabet with my illnesses. Being a mother has been very difficult for me and my many personalities that took turns raising the children and living my life.the whole changes of personalities the likes and dislikes the collections or hobbies or areas of interest that i have switched from over all these years and nobody ever thought it was odd and that more than one person was controlling my body??

Tagged: DID, frugal, mental illness, OCD

these are so good

Redsmoon — Sun, 08 May 2011 15:39:05 +0000

Tagged: DID, frugal, mental illness, OCD